Come play my game

yip its only 9days till Dougie woogie returns. I've been pretty darn good, except I kept having recurrent dreams about me forgetting i had a baby which when i looked it up said "If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses." I figured i was hiding how much i was missing Dougie. He's a big part of my life but thankfully my gals have been good and having this time with Sahara has been awesome. we had some great laughs sitting in our living room the past couple of weeks. So what have i been up to?? I have been at college, i got my hair highlighted and figured I'm going to go blonde as i will be able to get my roots done for marginal prices while at college. Nic, Eils, Amanda, Ade(amandas man) and i went to octopussy, The Arches the other wednesday, it was great, we sat in got drunk and watched heroes before heading out. It was also nice to talk to

Yup DOugie wogie has almost been gone two weeks and although I am missing him, I've been busy doing a promotion for sourz to get too bored and lonely. Mind you, this week I'm off college and no work. But my gals Amanda and eils are planning a trip to octopussy ARCHES on wednesday night. So I figured I'll join them ;) Tonight I'm going to do some waxing. So last week I was busy almost every night doing the sourz ZING promotion, which was a lot of fun as I got to draw on peoples faces for the whole night and give away free booze - Who doesn't love some1 who gives away free booze!! Mum and Dad are currently in L.A visitng my aunt, I had been invited but the docs said the plane journey was very much NOT a good idea. So not wanting to risk my lung popping again, I declined my dads nice offer. Instead they have got me a brand new sparkling pink Ipod!! YAY! I met some amazing folk last week doing the sourz promo, who were so lovely and nice and amazed that I'm living w

Claire was absolutely beautiful at her wedding and Robo was looking mighty dapper too. It was a lovely day and night, pretty awesome food too. Unfort I wasn't feeling to well so I wasn't the usual disco bunny that I am but YAY they are married. Also been on their amazing honeymoon too in Las Vegas. Last weekend was a busy wee one, I was out with my beauty gals on Friday night, only till 12am but had a good piss up for it and then it was Don's birthday. Fionas man Don, fiona planned an executed a very good surprise party. My fav part being when Karen(fleusy frewsy), nic nac and I all sang circle of life from lion king. I made karen and nic do the african accompaniment, but we rocked. Talking about rocked, the other week I went round to play rock band at nicolas with her and her bro Paul, we had a truly awesome time, it helped that we were pissing ourselves at pauls rendition of sabotage by the beastie boys- no one cant say that boy doesn't try! DOugie left on wednesday f

Yup those two words together send shivers up my spine and even worse today made me involuntarily have a wobble lip that wouldn't stop due to my emotional state . I had to go up to the hospital after dougie gave me a cold. I wont make him feel too bad about it. Anyway while I was up they decided to start me on orals, then told me I had to get some blood taken( walk in the park) but then when the lovely lady doc came to take my blood she filled me in that I needed to get blood gases done. That was it I started to cry. These things are bloody bloody sore. The only time it has been painless was when I was having my pneumo thorax and my inability to breathe kept my mind off the pain of getting a needle inserted into my artery. Anyway she said it would be a consultant who carried it out and that they would use anaestetic prior so that i wouldn't feel much. I'd love to say I felt fine after hearing that, ut thats when good ol wobbly lip came into play. However there is a happy

I know its been a while but I'll just bore you senseless with my goings on of late. I did my first outdoor climb which you will see a picture of. It was in a place called Auchinstarry and wasn't anything too scary but it was actually rather scary not being surrounded by pretty coloured holds(in the indoor climbing centre) yet I did two routes and actually enjoyed myself with thanks to Dougie(yup I've ditched the spider hobo, his real name is out) and Richie. It was dougies birthday on the 10th August(sunday) so on the saturday night we went to see mucous( dougs mates gemmas dads band) in nice and sleazys. I took a little fairy cake and candle along for midnight and the group sang happy birthday to doug as I presented him with his magical cake(Andy dont let slip it had fallen on the ground). Then last week Dougs and I went up to his home in Onich(beside Fort William), and visits to Dougs is ace cos his mum is an amazing cook- I love her caseroles yummy! And what made it even

I cant help but feel I'm dismissing my girls for SH, I'm going trough a bit of a weird one right now where I feel like I wanna spend as much time with SH as possible. I woud hope my girls know how much I love them and appreciate all they do for me. I just sometimes wish I had met SH earlier, but things wouldn't have been the way they are now. I know I will praise him a lot in these blogs but he is so truly amazing. Yesterday I went out with him to his friends cals birthday surprise night. It was in a curry house in glasgow, and it was amazing. After we went to Nice and sleazys where I spent a it of time talking to the lovly gemma(cals girlfriend), she has known SH from school. She said how happy he seems now, I would hope its a little do with me cos he makes me so incredibly happy. But I chose to go out with doug over going out with my girles, they haven't even been told yet that I'm going for transplant assessment. It's just I feel the more people I tell the tr

Its been a wee while, with all my best intentions somtimes it's hard to know where to start on this diary. But here goes and sorry if its a long one. I'm currently undergoing pre pre assessment for a transplant. So that means going to hspital(trying to find a friggin space in the car park) and getting CT scans, xrays, bloods, one density, ultra sounds and next week lung function. Every wee appointment just makes me more aware of the doors that may be opening or possibly shutting on me. The prospect of having no holiday for a while is horrible, especially with the hope that SH and I were going to go away. He has booked up for a 5week holiday in america his good friend from home is going for 13months and he is going to join him and another two great guys who I met this weekend on a trip to aberdeen. It was their leaving party and they are all brilliant dudes so I know he will have an amazing time. I hate using the word 'deserves' because I dont actually believe anyone

The past week has been great, I'm starting to get letters in for all my scans and ultrasounds and cardio things so that most of my tests are done pre first consultation with the docs I think. last week SH was away climbing on some very remote island in north Scotland. I tought my week would be pretty tough without him but it was fine, mum helped me a lot by taking me out and me and the girls went to see one of fellow gents in a play which was accompanied with a gorgeous dinner, so gorgeous I managed to eat all of mine and most of everyone sitting close to me's food. It has been pretty muggy in scotland lately and on the monday I kinda freaked out a little, I'm trying so hard not to be superstitious cos if it's gonna happen no amount of superstition will prevent the inevitable. But it so happens that every time SH has a holiday I seem to get critically crap health wise. So on Monday I was really struggling to sleep, trying to catch my breath, using my newly added fan- di

It's a wednesday afternoon and on account that I dont have tinternet I'm sitting at my mum and dads. Things have changed quite a lot in the past year. I'm a 24 year old with Cystic fibrosis and what was once an illness I believed I had full control over has kinda given me a shift kick in the ass recently. As far as I was concerned Cf and I had a pact, if he was acting up I would have a good three to five days to decide if he was becoming enough trouble that I'd need to pay good ol garty a visit. However last October I caught a cold which quickly turned into a virus which basically floored me in two days. Every movement was a bloody workout, I felt like I'd been winded constanly and every bit of energy that was entering my body was quickly draining right out my toes.So I was admitted for 3 weeks and because it was a virus9which we know now) for the first two weeks nothing seemed to work, so in my head I had to adjust to the fact that maybe this was me. Maybe Cf had d